Salt Lake Oppos

"Mercedes Streeter" (smart)
12/24/2016 at 15:47 • Filed to: SLC, Christmas

I’ve invaded your city! I’m driving around in an old Toyota Sienna with a handicap license plate and an Air Force decal on the driver’s door... Grandpa took good care of this thing!

Some things I’ve learned so far:

1. Everyone sucks at driving. I almost wrecked the Sienna because a delivery box truck decided to run a red light. Even my grandparents suck at driving. Both of their Toyotas have the “Camry Dent”.

2. Delta really really likes running Skywest CRJ900s to and from SLC...like they really love it. I love it too!!! The engines sound so fudging good. :D

3. SLC seems rather anti-fun. There are very few bars out here (and they’re pathetic compared to the Midwest) and the liquor stores start closing at 7pm...in fact everything starts closing around that time.

4. Mountain weather is cool. It’s been snowing on the nearby Wasatch Mountains for the past 24 hours, but the snow has yet to make it into the valleys.

5. The homeless population is treated SO MUCH NICER here than Chicago, and that warms my heart.

6. The city’s grid system is pretty intelligent... I mean the main city streets lead right to the Interstate too!!!

7. This Tram.

8. Our return plane will be an Airbus A319 because my mum is too scared of the CRJ900. This means we’ll be here two days longer than planned.

DISCUSSION (15)

hike > Mercedes Streeter
12/24/2016 at 15:52

I was just in SLC for the first time earlier this month. It’s a very cool city. The grid layout is fantastic as I barely needed the GPS to get around. I did notice the drivers suck. The speed limits are all 70 yet everyone was consistently going 60 in good weather. Made no sense to me. It’s not really a good city to drink in, since a good population is Mormon. I highly recommend checking out temple square at Christmas time as the lights are amazing. Enjoy!

Alfalfa > Mercedes Streeter
12/24/2016 at 15:53

We were ranked as the worst drivers as a state in a recent study. Liquor stores are run by the state, so they basically run a little bit longer than government hours.

Also you haven’t caught us on an inversion week, so that’s nice.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Mercedes Streeter
12/24/2016 at 15:54

The Provo valley holds the most aggressive, inconsiderate drivers I’ve ever encountered.

Frenchlicker > Mercedes Streeter
12/24/2016 at 15:57

I assume the fun problem would be due to the original founders being Mormon and it sticking. Just like how Indiana doesn’t have Sunday sales.

Alfalfa > hike
12/24/2016 at 15:59

I typically run 75, but going 60-65 in my Bronco I was always surprised how many people I would still end up passing on the freeway. But in spite of this fact, I never had to use the left-most lane. So that reenforces what I’ve always thought of left-lane loafers.

Alfalfa > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
12/24/2016 at 16:05

Provo is basically where the worst of all Utah stereotypes live.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Alfalfa
12/24/2016 at 16:07

Unfortunately, most of my family has moved there...

Alfalfa > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
12/24/2016 at 16:16

I’m sorry.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Alfalfa
12/24/2016 at 16:17

Not as sorry as I am haha